Ate sushi and learned that salmon rolls are freaking delicious and preferable to tuna rolls. (Though a tuna roll is better than no roll at all.)
Saw Star Trek Into Darkness and remembered that Zachary Quinto is an amazing Spock. (Also, Spock is my favorite forever — his logic is probably the total opposite of my mode of living and therefore seems very desirable. The yin to my yang.)
Helped my friend(s) move. I got Chipotle out of it. And then I bought my own beer because we ended up at Taphouse and I drank more beer today than I have in the past two weeks, probably. I also (finally) had their fries and, oh my god, they’re made in duck fat and then I got they covered in braised short ribs and mozzarella. Again, oh my god. (I drank a Creme Brûlée, Banana Bread and a Hoptimus Prime. Also delicious.)
Then I came home, did some grocery shopping (but forgot bread), watched Hemlock Grove and now I’m watching a TED talk on spirituality.
On my to do list:
Plan a few recipes to try out for a brunchy bridal shower.
Pick a weekend and plan invites for said bridal shower.
Eat at Smoke.
It’s been a good weekend. I’m sad to see it end. Mondays always bum me out a little and they always come too soon.
Since my last real update, I’ve run my first 5K and also buggered up my left leg now. Running and I don’t get along. I love moving and being outside and getting that time to myself, but my shins/ankles/knees don’t like the pounding of pavement. They need to get with it, because running is like yoga but more violent feeling.
I also tried the PiYo class. I’m not sold on it. I might give it a shot again next week or so before I totally write it off, but I don’t see us being long term partners. It requires too much quick movements into balance.
Pilates, however, is awesome and I love it. I’ve yet to try my local class. Maybe this Monday I’ll do it. The class doesn’t start until 7:15, so it’s a bit inconvenient in my neck of the woods, but the drive is much shorter. Always a trade off.
I’m also not sold on RIPPED, but I feel no need to try that one again.
My sister clued me in on the arc trainer. Holy hell, that burn calories SO WELL. I’ve never sweat so much in 30 minutes in my life. And it looks so easy! I don’t even have the intensity up halfway and sometimes I feel like I might die — but in a good way.
I tried a 20 minute HIIT routine in my living room. I’ve no idea how anyone could possibly survive an hour long class. Also, my downstairs neighbor probably hates me now, but I say that just makes us even.
This weekend, the new Star Trek movie comes out. My dad and I have a sushi and a movie date for Saturday afternoon. I’m pretty excited. The movie looks good and, well, Chris Pine. (Yum.)
And that’s my quick update. I’m pretty tired. I barely slept last night. (I think one of my customer’s is jinxing me! It seems that whenever he asks how my sleep is, I don’t sleep that night. Maybe when I say it’s going well, he pulls out a Christina-shaped voodoo doll and puts pins in all the insomnia places.) So I think it’s time for Harry Potter and bed.
Sounds like a plan. Happy hump day. (Pray for me, for tomorrow is a “long” day.)
A new song has been released to all of you wonderful people! I'm so glad (through all the hard work I've been doing over the last year and a half) you can finally hear some of the new tunes. The new single is "Who We Are" and it is probably the most proud I've ever been of a song.
My dear friend Dustin makes music. He just released a new single. You should go listen... and while you're in the music listening stage, check out his other songs here: http://www.reverbnation.com/dustinisenberg
Ok, go now. <3
It was my sister’s birthday. Because of this, we’re going to Lancaster tomorrow to hit up Sephora!
I’ve taken a Pilates class and a R.I.P.P.E.D. class. The Pilates, I liked. The R(etc), not so much. I do much better and am much happier with slow, controlled movements to work my muscles. This muscle confusion stuff doesn’t work out well for me.
I’ve decided that, since I liked Pilates and I know I like Yoga, I’m going to try a PiYo class Monday night at the East Shore YMCA. They have a fantastic class schedule, so I’m sure I’ll be traveling to Harrisburg quite a few times.
I made my first Pinterest failure. PB cookies. They taste like… blandness. From now on I will not trust PB cookie recipes with less than a cup of PB. Even if there is cream cheese also. (I thought, how can one go wrong with a stick of butter and cream cheese? Turns out, one can easily go wrong.)
I’m “running” my first 5K tomorrow morning! Tomorrow’s going to be a busy day. I’m running with Dustin tomorrow, shopping after with Allison, and then hanging with Dustin again that evening! Super excited about all of it.
Actually, this weekend’s gonna be busy. I’m even doing a Cinco de Mayo thing Sunday. This is me being a social butterfly rather than a social pariah.
I’ll try and actually update again before May’s over!
It’s been two months. I need to be better at this. Posting would be a lot easier if I had wifi at work and could use my iPad, but that’s a lousy excuse.
Truth is, I’ve been busy. I spent three recent Sundays in a row watching Monthy Python at The Elks Theater. (It was Pythonfest and featured: Search for the Holy Grail, Life of Brian (my favorite) and Meaning of Life.)
I’ve also been going out and trying new beers. (I’m christinaheart on the Untappd app if you’d like to stalk my beer drinking.)
I’ve also attended some tea parties. I made my first real tea purchase this weekend. I must remember to make some of the good stuff tomorrow for work. I need a pick me up at work and if Valentine’s Day isn’t a good enough reason to make delicious tea, I don’t know what is.
I’ve also been at the gym as many times as possible. I usually stick to the elliptical, but last night I tried spinning (the cycling kind, not the yarn kind) for the first time. I feel like I’ve been punched in the vagina, but it was fun otherwise.
I need to start training for the two 5Ks I’m planning to sign up for. (The Jersey Mike Memorial Rock + Run 5K in Harrisburg and the Color Me Rad 5K in Bethlehem are tucked nicely in spring. I don’t think I could run any distance in the summer.) I really don’t like running, guys. There’s too much gravity involved. But the Jersey Mike run is for a good cause and the Color Me Rad is so, well, colorful! I just have to do it, you guys.
That’s what I’ve been up to.
How’s it been in your world?
So, a few quick things. The past couple months have been tumultuous. I don’t often post about my personal-personal life here, but I’m going to share a few things.
I’ve been struggling with insomnia from hell since the beginning of October. Of course, this has exasperated my anxiety and so I’ve been caught up in a whirlwind of emotions. I’ve even gone to see a psychiatrist, which… well, I don’t know. At least I’m not crawling out of my skin due to inadvertent Xanax withdrawal anymore. But the more I think about things, the more upset I get that I was ever started on a benzo. (I don’t even know how to spell the full name of the suckers.)
My advice? Don’t take them unless you know it’s not going to be every day. Take them only when you cannot stand the anxiety anymore. The insomnia I had then was at least naturally occurring. I think sleeping less than 2 hours was incredibly odd a year ago. If only I knew then what I know now.
Don’t get me wrong. It was good to get put on a longer acting benzo. It has calmed my anxiety down. But, really, the only nights I sleep are nights that my mind is at peace and no amount of medicine can do that. That’s going to be me talking things out and being proactive about what’s on my mind or happening in my life. (Or at least really trying to be.) Last night was a sucker punch to the gut because I came home feeling unheard and misunderstood by the doctor playing with my brain chemicals, so of course I didn’t sleep. Sometimes I don’t sleep because I feel excited about things. That’s a real bummer, though, because the excitement wears thinner and thinner as the hours tick by without any dreaming in between.
It seems my anxiety is cyclical. It kicks up a little bit in the summer (to managable levels) and then again in the fall (to not so manageable seeming levels). Come spring, I tend to feel better.
Of course, now I’m facing the prospect of an antidepressant to help stabilize my anxiety. I hate this idea for a few reasons: (1) My anxiety is not ALWAYS through the roof, (2) my anxiety sort of makes me who I am, in a way — over-analytical and a bit of a perfectionist, (3) my anxiety has me asking myself tough questions which, I hope, will pay off in the long run and (4) both attempts at SSRIs have made me a pukey or gaggy mess. The last one made me feel jittery and gave me moments of depersonalization.
Do you know how weird it is to feel like you’re not real and nothing around you is real all the while KNOWING it is real? It’s really weird. Anxiety itself is really weird, so I didn’t need any medicinal help getting weird.
I’ve been trying to get to the gym on a semi-regular basis. I tend to sleep better on days I go, so maybe I have to start going first thing in the morning since, even on good nights, I’m only sleeping until 4:30/5:30. I keep thinking if I can just wear myself out, maybe I can sleep and I can avoid the ADs. I’ve started taking Omega-3 just a few days ago. I’m hoping that will help too.
All I really want is to get off the benzos and see if I can learn to work with my anxiety rather than hating it so much. I’ve always had it and I think it’s kept me out of trouble a few times.
Oh, wait, no. What I really want is a time machine so I could warn myself about things to come and give myself a few pointers.
But listen, it’s not all bad. Good things are happening too and I just keep pushing forward the best I can. It’s all I can do, right? Just keep swimming!
Anyway, that’s why the regular posts stopped. I’ve been trying to get myself “fixed.” I’m not sure I’m definitely on the right track, but hell, life doesn’t come with a map. It’s unfortunate, but true. I think a map would be really handy.
“For a new adventure, travel back this small path — nothing will eat you at the other end. I promise fun will be had.” or “Beware, there are mythical soul-eating dogs down this path — DO NOT GO TO THERE!”
Anyway, I’m off to CVS to do some question asking and whatnot. That’s my little update. I promise I’m not crazy, I just feel/seem that way sometimes.
I get it, something’s wrong. I feel on edge constantly, I’ve had insomnia for at least a month and I develop random aches and pains that, I suppose thankfully, don’t always last too long. My stomach hurts, I’m tired, clearly something is out of whack.
But I’d really appreciate it if you’d stop torturing me so much and give me a clue, any insight whatsoever, into why I’m having such a weird two years. And maybe let me get back to a normal sleeping schedule so I can deal with these things better…
That would be amazing. I ask this of you, Universe, on the 27th anniversary of my birth. I just want a little peace and sleep. That is all I ask for, it’s what I’ve been wishing for… But maybe I get a special in today being it’s my birthday and all.
In the meantime, I’m going to have my first cup of coffee in over a year so I don’t feel so exhausted. I’d appreciate it also if this cup of coffee didn’t make me feel like my heart is going to explode.
Kay, thanks.
It’s my birthday, so please help me out.
Please.
((I guess I’d better post this before we lose power for a week. Anticipatory anxiety is my favorite!))
I don’t usually post about particular politicians. I usually just go off on a “feminazi” or “crazy libby” rant. This time, though, I’m going to share a mailing from the Republican Party of Pennsylvania.
They seem to be focusing a lot of attention on our local state representative seat. I think that’s a good sign because maybe that means they’re worried about losing this seat. I’ve gotten so many incredibly negative junk mailers from them.
This one, though… oh my lord.
Look, I’m a pretty reasonable person. My dad and I even agree on some things despite being political opposites.
Look, there’s nothing “extreme” about supporting equal rights for all people — because gays and lesbians are people too. They deserve every right I have as a heterosexual. Including the right to be legally married. (And no, this does not impose upon religious beliefs because, guess what, churches don’t HAVE to marry anyone.) So heaven forbid Equality PA or Victory Fund support you. Gay rights are a civil rights issue. If you don’t agree with gay marriage, then don’t engage in one.
Side note: If you really want to save marriage, make it illegal for people who engage in domestic violence to get married. Or teach love, acceptance, tolerance and forgiveness. He asks, “Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?” (Matthew 7:3)
But supporting LGBT rights is so extreme that it’s something I’ve supported since I was at least 5 without even thinking about it. Treat others as you’d like to be treated. Simple and not extreme!
Economic Justice: Prosperity should be accessible to everyone, not merely the few.
Civil Rights: Every individual’s civil rights must be protected; discrimination and harassment based on race, ethnicity, gender, religion, sexual orientation, or physical and developmental ability should be banned.
Health Care: Every individual should have affordable, quality health care.
Education: It is essential that we invest in quality public education for all.
Environment: We must commit to restoring and protecting our environment.
Reproductive Freedom: Women and men – not politicians – deserve the right to make personal decisions about their reproductive health in accordance with their own personal and moral beliefs.
The right to make decisions about when to have children? HEALTH CARE FOR EVERYONE? AN EDUCATION? EQUALITY?
*sarcasm* Oh it’s just so horrible! Women should be baby machines! People need to die more often. Ignorance is bliss. And if there are no second class citizens, we’d actually have to respect one another. How terrible!
Planned Parenthood also likes to provide health care, sex education, and reproductive services to people. Lately, Planned Parenthood has been under attack because they provide women with medical services that are important to their reproductive lives. (Yes, sometimes this is abortion — which turns out isn’t an issue that is black and white.) I guess it’s forgotten that even men use their services.
Planned Parenthood is not extreme. They do want to protect women’s (and general) health issues by preventing interference by politicians who think women have a special way to shut down pregnancies in cases of rape. They don’t go around poking holes in condoms or anything. They provide cancer screenings and annual exams that prevent disease, pregnancies and even deaths. They want to keep medical decisions between a patient and their doctor.
And why, WHY are unions considered soooo evil? They’ve fought to give us 40 hour work weeks/overtime pay, safer working conditions, time off to care for sick children and parents, and time off to mourn a death. That’s just a few of the “perks” labor unions have gotten us. You think most corporations care to improve their working conditions if their workers all just roll over and do everything they say for low pay and no benefits? No one could make a living that way… We owe a lot to hard fought union battles, even if we’re not unionized.
On the flip side of the mailer, they cite calls for gun control laws from a paper written about domestic violence victims. (I think we can all agree that abusive jerks shouldn’t have guns and there should be better protections in place for domestic abuse victims.)
Lamassu (winged, human headed bull), from the citadel of Sargon II, Dur Sharrukin, Assyria (modern Khorsabad, Iraq), 720-705 BCE.
Someday, I hope I have enough money and time to go to Europe. I want to go to the Louvre to see these bad boys.
First, a little background on the lamassu. Lamassu are Mesopotamian protective deities or spirits. They were winged, man-bulls who were placed at city gates to protect the city. In some cases, they were carved into clay tablets to be buried at home entryways to protect individual households. They aren’t demons, they are simply creatures your would want on your side if you were being attacked or invaded.
This particular lamassu was created during the rule of the Assyrians; they were in charge after the Babylonians and Hittites fell from power. These guys were placed at the gates of Sargon II’s palace. They were suppose to ward off the king’s enemies (mortal and immortal). They’re huge — they measure in at 13′ 10″ high. The feat of getting the lamassu into place was so incredible that Sargon’s successors created reliefs in their palace showing men dragging the lamassu into place using ropes and sledges.
They are carved partially in the round, but the artist created them as high reliefs. From the front, you see the animal at rest with both hooves firmly on the ground. From the side, you see the animal in motion. This means that the lamassu, when viewed in totality, has five legs. This provided the popular and descriptive composite view so popular with ancient man.
My opinion? Just how cool are these guys? They’re intimidating, but not grotesque. I mean, they could simply step on you if they wanted to stop you. They’re so detailed too. I love how intricate they are, especially the beard. Oh, and I think the wrap around horns are awesome. It’s smart that they kept them inline with the rest of the head, if they had protruded, they probably would have gotten broken off by vandals or just due to time passing. Keeping everything compact made it possible for the entire sculpture to stay relatively intact over the course of thousands of years. Dear Winged Bullman, I think you’re rad. (I also think Pegasus from the Disney version of Hercules is rad. I like mystical winged creatures, I guess.)
