((A word of caution: I wrote this on my iPad, so it may be a little ramble-gamble here and there. It also might include typos.))
Apparently this girl who writes a blog called “Skinny Gossip” caused quite the stir by comparing a runway model to a cow. I don’t keep up with the fashion world. Being a “cow” myself, I can’t find any satisfaction in watching girls — who embody a figure that is, for a mass majority of girls, unattainable through healthy means — strut down a runway.
I completely understand a desire to be healthy. I understand the desire naturally skinny girls — because they do exist and we should stop the hate — might have to stop having to hear that they should eat more or be curvier*. Their bodies are simply not curvy. Their metabolism, god bless them, is high. They eat a healthy diet and they work out regularly. We can simultaneously encourage healthy habits while embracing a naturally curvy girl. We can embrace curvy girls while also embracing skinny girls! It’s not difficult!
But the Skinny blog’s author is being disingenuous. She is attacking other skinny girls for being fat and attacking girls who are curvy for being “cows.” I might not be 5’7″ and 100 lbs, but I am not a cow. I am 5’4″ and I last weighed in at** about 145 pounds. I peaked at 155. My lowest weight at this height was 115. At 115 I was too bony. I feel very comfortable where I am right now. Actually, I felt comfortable at 155. I do not have a double chin. I am not a beached whale. In fact, no one is a beached whale because whales are not human. They live in the sea and eat krill and occasionally come to the surface to breath and put on a show for the tiny humans who are whale watching.
You see, I think someone’s worth — whether they are skinny or “fat” — comes from inside themselves.*** If they are caring, they are worthy. If they are intelligent and compassionate, they are worthy. What are they worthy of? Respect.
“Thinsporation” is dangerous. Calling Paris Hilton and Lindsey Lohan fat is crazy. They are hardly an example of overindulgence in anything but materialism. Food is not an enemy, it is fuel your body needs to heal and function and love. (For example, I highly doubt this Kate Upton is eating a greasy burger every day. By posing with food she is fighting another dangerous idea that models must starve themselves to be worthy of people’s attention. I bet she works out too and has been deemed “healthy” by all medical measures of weight to height.)
Listen, I honestly feel like someone who has a website like this is probably hurting from something. Calling very skinny girls “fat” is disturbing, especially from someone who is claiming to fight a double standard — one that does exist and I am sorry to admit, I’ve been guilty of participating in the past. But I’ve never heard anyone attacked for saying, “How do I look this good? I work hard and I eat a healthy diet.” I’ve heard people admit they wish they had the willpower. I’ve heard people jealous that someone might make all that looks so easy.
Calling these skinny girls out and threatening them with violence and rape is disgusting (and one of the many reasons society needs to get out of a mindset that sexism doesn’t exist). You might not agree with them, but they are not evil. (Though, they are very dangerous to young girls who are developing an eating disorder.) They might convince someone that their bones (you can be big boned and healthy!) are too big. But they’re probably reacting to the way they’ve been made to feel about their bodies by outside sources and I hope they find acceptance with themselves eventually.
Women constantly get the message that we’re not skinny enough, we’re not wealthy enough, we’re not beautiful enough, not sexual enough, or were too sexual and too beautiful to be smart.
Or maybe we’re too skinny.
The point is, your goal should be to be as healthy as possible and a contributing part of society. Not skinny enough to bag a guy. Not beautiful enough to land that job. You need to be enough as you are.
Once that happens, the fat girl and the skinny girl can be friends rather than frienemies.
* they might also have the desire to punch you in the face when you tell them to eat a cheeseburger
**this was months ago, but my clothes still fit.
*** Maybe I’m an idealist, but how will anything improve without the existence of people like me?